Thursday, February 16, 2006
Self-absorbed, but probably not conceited
I don’t know if this is normal for those who enjoy writing, but I really love going back and reading what I’ve written. No, I mean I really like it. When I’m proofreading I might go over something like five times at least, to make sure it sounds just like how I want it. But it’s not just that. I often rediscover things I scribbled out years ago, somewhat fascinated that I had written it. Often I read my posts from just a few days ago and still find it quite entertaining. I’m like my biggest fan.
Is that weird? It makes me feel conceited. Do you remember that movie Someone Like You with Ashley Judd and Hugh Jackman? Her first boyfriend in the movie was played by… whats-his-name… aww crap let me Google it… That’s what it was! Greg Kinnear, he’s so forgettable, why is that? But anyway, his character is a writer, completely self-absorbed and in love with his typwriters as well as himself. Someone is quoting some part of an article he wrote and he mouths the words as they read, having memorized everything. I know I’m not that bad, but sometimes it feels like I am a little bit.
I do re-read some of the books I own, but only after I’ve forgotten most of the plot. My stuff I could re-read almost endlessly. But I guess it’s a good thing I don’t get sick of myself. That would be awkward. How could you keep writing if you get sick of yourself? “Oh no, there I go again, writing more of that insipid shit again...” Would make for some interesting internal dialog, don’t you think?
Me 1: I feel like writing some more of my thoughts down.
Me 2: Aw crap, not again.
Me1: What? I have a lot of thoughts!
Me 2: Can’t you just have them and then move on like everybody else? Do you have to write about every little thing?
Me 1: It helps me think.
Me 2: Think? Think?! You spend so much time thinking it’s giving me a headache!
Me 1: Then let me write it down and then we can go play video games, how about that?
Me 2: Okay. But make it quick.
Maybe I’m just weird.
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