Saturday, April 07, 2007
Recipe for a bad night's sleep
First, spend an entire day driving to someone’s house across the state. Make sure you arrive plenty late so there’s no chance of going to sleep early because you will spend at least two hours talking (or fixing a computer while others talk, in my case). When it’s finally time to go to bed, see if you can get assigned to the little kids room—The one with the massive quantity of junk balanced precariously on a single shelf that is bent under its weight because it has no middle support… directly above the beds. Yes that one. It’ll do wonders for your peace of mind.
Next, get woken up by a rooster a few hours later. Not just any rooster, make sure it’s one that has no concept of time and decides 4am is time to get up because it doesn’t know the difference between a farm and a city. Even better is if you can get two roosters to get into a crowing competition so that there’s noise every 10 seconds. If you happen to get used to the concert and start dozing off, there should be a clock with hourly bird calls to keep you alert, immediately followed by a 6am alarm from a cell phone that isn’t even yours that was left in the room. Mix well, and you should be well on your way to having nice bags under your eyes.
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Categories: • Grrrrrr... • Sometimes I have a life