Thursday, June 28, 2007

I'm doomed

At the office, I’m part of a three-person team of web developers. The workload is fine, though we’ve had our limits tested this past year because we’ve been transitioning to a new system. We’ve had to migrate a bazillion web pages and documents to this new system, and while it’s still be developed, we still have to post updates as requested. Only it’s double the usual work because we have to update it in two places until the final tweaks to the system are complete. It’s very annoying.

I just found out that one of the team, the one who’s been here the longest, is leaving the company. Shit. Next week is his last week, and we still have a monumental pile of shit to do for the migration. No deadlines are going to be moved for us. We just have to suck it up and divvy up his work between me and the other guy. After the meeting where the announcement was made, I felt a slight, uncharacteristic headache coming on. I passed the remaining web developer in the hallway a few minutes later and whispered to him, “We are so fucked.” He smiled tiredly and said, “I know.”

I’m not freaking out or anything. It’s just this impending sense that I’m going to be doomed to a shitload of work every single day for the next two months or more. However long it’ll take to hire and train a replacement. This is going to severely impact my daily blogging. Just a warning to any who care. My posts are about to become quite sporadic.

Sigh.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Memory lane

I just got back from a trip to visiting my mom. My blog tends to have lots of foreshadowing posts about my reluctance to spend a lot of time with dear mom a few days before such a trip, but I decided to forgo them this time as it gets old. Anyway, she’s been spending lots of time organizing all the crap in the house. There are no doubts whatsoever where I get my packrat tendencies from. A lot of the stuff I had left in my old room is still there. She didn’t want to throw any of it out without me going through it first.  Quite sweet of her really.

I found all sorts of stuff that made me go “Heeeyyy I remember this...” So let’s take a walk down memory lane. That’s right, it’s bad fuzzy photo time. Don’t worry, it’s a short walk.

This is probably the oldest toy I own. I got it when I was so little I can’t even remember receiving it. I used to sleep with it every night, right on through all of elementary school. Yes it’s an odd stuffed animal, but it’s from Taiwan (like that explains anything).  It’s an orange dog in a schoolboy outfit. And a bow tie. I used play with it by making him walk and sit. I guess I must’ve played with him quite a lot because the fabric at the waist came apart. If you look closely, you can see my frankenstitching in white thread.





It says “I"m not lazy, I’m just overcome by gravity”. For some reason it was one of my favorite shirts back in junior high. It usually made people look twice, not because it was particularly funny, but because the pudgy little man looks naked, and the little TV on his belly looks like an erection at first glance.





I don’t remember where I found it, but there was this picture in a magazine of some random old guy. He was sitting so properly that I carefully cut him out of the magazine and taped him onto my cabinet so that it looked like he was just sitting there. Just perfectly content to sit on the little ledge of my cabinet door. Not sure how old I was, or why I even did that, I just thought it was funny I guess. I never bothered to take it down, and neither did my mom. I wonder if she thinks it’s someone I know?





This last one is a real gem. My mom buys hoards of items when it’s on sale. Sometimes to the point where it never gets used, but she keeps them anyway because “someone could still use them”. Case in point: sanitary napkins from the 70s. I didn’t need to use any of these things until the late 80s. I read once in a Judy Blume novel about a girl trying on some pads that required some sort of belt hookup. I was totally confused about what they were talking about, but at least it gave me some point of reference for these “new beltless super thin ones”! Yes! No belt required! Wheeeee!

Friday, June 22, 2007

I need a removeable head

I’m not having many coherent thoughts today. Possibly because I didn’t sleep all that well. I kept waking up for some reason, and I’d find myself in a completely different position than I was in when I went to sleep. I used to be a fairly still sleeper, I wonder what happened? It’s messing up my efforts to keep my neck straight while I’m sleeping. I need a removeable head. Just pop it off and set it aside when it’s time to go to bed. That would be cool. It would make ergonomic sleeping so much easier.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

I think I need a new pillow

I started seeing a chiropractor for my constant stiff neck and shoulders. (Stiff necks have been a problem for me for so many years, it almost seems “normal”. Stupid me.) It’s only been a week so it may not have been long enough to see results.  Still, every single morning I wake up with a very stiff neck.  I have to do stretches over the course of the day to loosen it enough to touch my chin to my chest. It never really occured to me, but perhaps my pillow is to blame?

The chiropractor suggested rolling up a towel and placing it at the base of my skull when I sleep.  I tried that and it just isn’t comfortable.  I gave it a couple of hours and couldn’t fall asleep. Maybe I needed a smaller towel, I don’t know. It just felt like pressure rather than support.  But she never once asked what kind of pillow I sleep on. Wouldn’t that make a difference?

My pillow is a normal synthetic fiber fill, a little on the flat side (because pillows that are too puffy give me an even stiffer neck). I’m thinking I need to try a different pillow, because I’m not really noticing any difference with the chiro adjustments yet. Have any of you had neck problems that were solved by a special pillow? What did you use? What have you tried that didn’t work? I tried a contoured foam pillow a few years ago and that just make my neck feel worse.

I’ve been reading about buckwheat pillows and one called Mediflow that you fill with water. Of course there are raving testimonials everywhere, but I have no idea how many of them were written by real people and not just people who work for the company. What’s worked for you guys?

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

I have a confession to make

Despite all my talk about doing the right thing and wanting to help people when I can, there are times when my selfish nature rejoices. At the office, screwups happen. Maybe the wrong document was replaced on the website, or maybe part of a project was completely overlooked. When these things happen, my first thought is, “Oh shit I hope that wasn’t me.” I am so far from perfect, sometimes those screwups really are from me.

Imagine my relief when it turns out to be one of the other guys on my team. This isn’t selfish, I know. It’s just relief that I wasn’t the screwup. But deep down, I can feel it, there is a small part of me that isn’t just relieved, it’s gleeful that someone on my own team messed up because it makes me look like a better worker. I would never try to sabotage anyone in an effort to make myself look good, but if they do it on their own, I don’t feel bad for them. I secretly hope that they make more mistakes than me for this reason.

No matter how objective people try to be, we’re all graded on a curve. I could work harder and outshine everyone, but it’s so much easier when others around you shine less. Right? Does that make me lazy? Insecure? Probably. I’m not proud of it, but there it is. 

Monday, June 18, 2007

People wear the strangest things

I was at the gym today and saw this large lady changing into her gym outfit.  I wasn’t really looking or anything, but what caught my attention was the rustling sound of… something that I don’t normally hear in a locker room. Judging from the noise, I would have guessed someone was handling a tarp. I looked to see what it was, and it was this lady putting on some kind of outfit made of… I dunno, blue plastic?  Whatever it was, it wasn’t cloth and definitely wasn’t breathable. It was weird, and here she was putting on this long-sleeved top and pants of the same thick material.

Somebody please tell me the logic behind this. I’ve seen people wearing similar outfits, except it was thinner material and was wrinkled and silver, like some kind of weird space suit made out of garbage bags.  Is it so you’ll sweat more? So they’ll have softer skin from soaking in their own sweat? That’s disgusting. Why not just wear sweatsuits or fleece? You sweat more when you’re hot, not because you’re wearing non-breathable material. These strange workout outfits are just bizarre and stupid.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Showers and gifts and stuff

I can understand baby showers. I don’t really like attending them, but I guess having a baby, especially the first one, is a huge life change and requires lots and lots of new supplies and equipment. Babies are expensive little boogers. A little help from friends is nice.

It’s bridal showers I don’t get. If you’re having a wedding, you’re already getting tons of gifts, often expensive ones. Weddings are usually kinda big and everyone attending is expected to shell out something in exchange for chowing down on your reception food. So what the hell is a bridal shower for? What, the wedding gifts aren’t enough? You have to wheedle even more gifts out of your friends? That’s just tacky.

I have a friend who’s getting married later this year. I hate weddings, but what kind of a friend would I be if I didn’t go, y’know? But it’s never just the one thing, is it? Now I’m stuck having to go to a bachelorette party AND a bridal shower. Do you remember the last bachelorette party I went to? Yeah, the one with the sweaty gross strippers. Come to think of it, that party was for the same friend! I’d forgotten, she bailed out of the whole wedding thing. Imagine how pissed her parents were after having reserved banquet halls and stuff. They lost their deposit, and here she is trying the wedding thing again… with the same guy. Can you believe it? Would it be rude of me to tell her to get a clue?

Well anyway, bachelorette parties are okay by me. Celebrate your final days of singlehood and stuff. But bridal showers? Lame, lame, lame excuses to squeeze your friends and relatives for more than you deserve. 

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Working and whining

All too often they go hand in hand, don’t they? For me, the technical aspects of maintaining a corporation’s many websites is not the hard part.  It’s trying to figure out what they want and managing their expectations.  It usually goes something like this…

1. Department head says they want a new page, and they need it to launch the same day as some article they are publishing.
2. I say no problem, give me the material and it’ll be done in plenty of time.
3. They give me an overview of the kind of information that will go on there.
4. Time goes by, I create the new page’s shell based on what little they gave me.
5. Project manager comes by and asks how the page is coming along, and if it will be ready for the launch date.
6. I show what I have and inform him that I still have no materials to put in.
7. Project manager seems mildly surprised and says he’ll get the information to me.
8. A few hours later, after I’ve gone for the day, the project manager emails me a message with tons of attachments, explaining in great detail how he renamed the files so I could tell which was which.
9. I stare at all this and sigh heavily. So much blabber about file names and no directions on how this stuff is to be arranged. Where on the page do these things belong? There are multiple sections requiring different kinds of data and attachments. What goes where dammit?? Mind reading is the single most powerful ability when you’re part of a corporation.
10. I go to the project managers desk, but he’s always on the phone, managing other projects. So I email him with my questions.
11. He waits until I’m gone for lunch to come to my desk.
12. I come back, expecting some kind of email response, and there is none.
13. He doesn’t get back to me until 15 minutes before I’m supposed to leave for the day to help me sort it all out, then informs me that they expect to launch the next day.
14. I do a mad dash and finish everything in record time because I have a doctor’s appointment after work.
15. The next day, they decide to delay the new web page’s launch because they want more information on there first. Information they were never able to give me.
    I hate fake deadlines. It’s likely that it’s a project manager’s tactic for getting things done on time, but it would help if they would give me the fucking materials in time for their imaginary deadlines! The managers and content providers drag their feet because they know what the actual deadline is, but they keep pushing everyone else towards the fake one even though we don’t have everything we need. Fucking fickle bastards.
    Posted by Geeky Dragon Girl on 06/14 at 05:41 AM
    (4) Comments • Permalink
    Categories: • Grrrrrr... • Office Hijinks

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Uhh... when was this?

So, postal rates changed recently, right? Or maybe not so recently. Was it like in January or something? I don’t know, but I didn’t realize it had changed until last month. I wonder what happened to all the mail I sent with the old postage amount on it? I think sometimes I need to venture out from under this rock a little more often and get with the times.

*shrug* Oh well. *crawls back under rock*

Monday, June 11, 2007

Movies I just don't get

I enjoy a lot of movies, but there are some movies that are so popular and widely loved that I just don’t understand why that is the case.  WARNING: May contain plot spoilers.

1. Gone With the Wind - Rhett is a chauvanist asshole and Scarlett is a spoiled, stubborn whiner. I can’t relate to either of these characters.  I can’t even like them! They are so annoying that I had to stop watching it because all I wanted to do was kick both their asses. What exactly is likeable about this movie?

2. Scarface - A guy immigrates to the U.S., is unsatisfied with the piecemeal jobs he’s able to get, involves himself with drug dealers, rises to the top, gets addicted to drugs along the way, and gets gunned down in the end. Epic rise and fall of a not very nice guy. There are no good guys, nobody triumphs in the end, why should I care about this movie?

3. There’s Something About Mary - Everyone I’ve spoken to think this is one of the funniest things they’ve ever seen. I disagree. The humor is ridiculous and some of the scenes are so over-the-top and exaggerated that I can’t quite like this movie very much. There’s no wit to be found anywhere here.

4. Any of the James Bond movies - Yes there’s action aplenty and lots of nifty neato gadgets, but I have a hard time attaining any kind of an affinity for a predictable womanizer. I’m able to watch one from start to finish, but if the power got unplugged halfway through the movie, I’d be okay with not finishing it. I like to care about the characters in a movie, and the characters in James Bond movies just don’t seem to have much depth or personality.

5. Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon - Sure it’s cinematic and dramatic, but I don’t care much for the constant flying through the air. I prefer the old kung fu movies of the 70s with the dubbed over voices and sound effects. Much more realistic action. And the fact that it ends in tragedy, after all they went through, really sucks. I hate movies that are downers.

I’d add Titanic, but I haven’t actually seen it yet, so I can’t truthfully say I don’t care for it. There’s a slim chance that I might like it, but considering that I already know how it ends, I doubt it.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Which establishment would you run?

My sweety thinks it would be really cool to own a coffee shop.  The thought terrifies me because there’s way more work involved than you ever see on TV. For some insane reason I majored in hotel/restaurant management, so I have some idea of the madness involved, and I want no part of it. Permits, licenses, food handling safety, correct holding temperatures, building leases, accounting, inspections… it’s enough to make my head explode if I had to figure all that shit out.

However, if you could find someone talented to manage all that for you, then yeah, I can see how it might be kinda fun. I don’t know if a coffee shop would be my thing though. As I was driving in to work, I thought about other types of food establishments. If you could run one of the following, which would you choose?

1. Coffee shop
2. Deli
3. Fast food
4. Fine dining
5. Bakery
6. Seafood or other specialty restaurant
7. A little bit of everything like Denny’s
8. Breakfast house

I don’t drink coffee, so a coffee shop doesn’t really appeal to me, especially when there’s a Starbucks on every corner. A deli… nah, how interesting can a sandwich be? Though the hours would be fairly normal, not too early and not too late. Fast food, hell no! Too much stress to get everything out fast and not enough nutrition. Fine dining is pretentious, plus I’d get the utensil arrangements all wrong. Bakeries are a little too specific… and tempting. I don’t know enough about food to be any good at specialty restaurants or even a varied menu like Denny’s.

But if there’s one thing I can do, it’s breakfast. On most weekends I’m the morning chef. Well, “chef” may be a bit strong since I’m not that talented. But I can do pancakes, french toast, waffles, oatmeal, and cream of wheat pretty good. I’ve added all sorts of things to scrambled eggs to make them interesting. Maybe it’s the simplicity of breakfast that allows me to be good at it. It’s probably why you won’t see me doing eggs benedict (not good at sauces) or omelets (too uncoordinated to shape it right).

Considering how many people drink coffee in the mornings, it would probably be a good mix to do a coffee shop/breakfast house. We’d have to start incredibly early, but we’d get to close kinda early too and have the rest of the day to ourselves. Theoretically speaking. So there’s my answer. Breakfast anyone?

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Some people are scary

I was at the gym a little while ago, about to leave the locker room and head back to the office. As I was zipping up my gym bag, this lady walks in, tall, big hair, weird smile, and a face as red as a tomato. It’s a good thing she was smiling at a friend as she walked in because I did a double take she looked so weird. It was her makeup. She had layered the blush on there (all over her face, not just the cheeks) so thickly that she seriously looked like a tomato. Add hot pink lipstick to this equation and penciled on eyebrows and you have a cartoon character come to life.

I had flashbacks to Tammy Faye Baker, she was that scary. It just isn’t necessary! I don’t understand it at all. She was a hispanic lady, so she had the naturally beautiful, warm skin tones going. Why try to cover it up with multiple frightening layers of makeup? Yack. I’m glad I was leaving, because I don’t know that I could stop staring at this train wreck.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

For those who are obsessive-compulsive about their computer

My desk at work may look messy and disorganized, my drawers (the kind a desk has, not my undies) may also look like a haphazard mess of things thrown together, but goshdarnit my PC is one of the neatest and most organized things you’ve ever seen! I HATE computer clutter. I see coworkers with shortcuts scattered across their desktops, practically covering the entire screen. I can’t stand looking at it… makes me want to sit down and organize it. 

At work I have only one row of useful icons on one side. At home it’s two rows, but anytime it gets to three rows I immediately prune it back down to two. My Start menu is alphabetically organized, and if there are too many things cluttering it, I organize the shortcuts into folders. Neat and orderly is how my computers must be.

Another thing I find myself being quite anal about is the order in which my running programs have their icon in my taskbar. At the office, I use the same programs every day, with multiple programs open at once at all times.  It saves time instead of waiting for the things to open when I need them. At any one time I can easily have eight programs running at once. In addition to this I usually have about eight browsers open at once. That’s a lot of stuff sitting in my taskbar, but it’s usually no problem because I open the programs in a particular order. That way I never have to hunt for the right icon down there.

There are times, however, when a program crashes or I accidentally close a window and it messes up my order when I have to open it again. It irks me to no end! I would rather close all the programs that are in the way and reopen them all in the correct order so I can keep working as before. A bit OCD? Maybe. Today my Outlook needed to be closed and restarted because of some change the company made while it was open. It was the second program I keep open on my PC, so that would mean closing and reopening 10 or more other windows to get everything back in order. Very irritating!

Lucky for me, after a quick search I found a few programs you can install that allows you to drag and drop your taskbar items into the order you want them. Simple, yet ingenius. I chose Taskbar Shuffle, and the download is less than 1MB. It was a very quick install, and it worked instantaneously. You run it, then use your mouse to drag and drop your taskbar icons around. You can let it keep running in the background, or exit it when you’re done. It’s so quick, I just open it whenever I need it. I love this little program! Just wanted to share it with any of you who might be as OCD about their PC as I am.

Monday, June 04, 2007

An odd memory of an an odd trade

Not sure why this popped into my head while I was trying to fall asleep last night, but for some reason it did. Halfway through college, my parents let me take an ancient TV that they had laying around the house. I think it was as old, if not older, than me. It was color, but it predated VCRs, which meant it only had hookups for rabbit ears and not for coaxial cable. Very limiting.

My roommate at the time had a boyfriend who was very friendly (in a fun way, not that creepy, overly flirty way) and as a group we would sometimes go through my CD collection and sing along with some of the cheesier ones. Milli Vanilli was one of his particular favorites. Anyway, one day I was complaining that I couldn’t hook up a VCR to my old TV. He said that it was no problem, that they had a simple part that you attach to it so you could hook up a coaxial cable (and thus get cable TV as well). In fact, he said he had one laying around his house and he would give it to me. I offered to trade him the Milli Vanilli CD for it instead. He happily agreed and was excited to get his hands on the CD.

Who do you think got the better deal?

Friday, June 01, 2007

Can I go home yet?

I still have an hour to go and plenty of work to do, but every time I try to focus on it, my eyes roll to the back of my head and my brain drifts off to thoughts of dinner, movies, video games, and numerous other non-work things. Working sucks. But I suppose it’s better than not working and being penniless.

 

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